By Paula Bianchi –
I know I’m striking a chord with the title of this article. The moment you read it; you had a flash of memory of everything you beat yourself up for. Why? Well, this is all too familiar a territory for most of us because it’s something that we’ve done to ourselves for most of our lives.
If you’re not careful, beating yourself up can lead to you needing to seek out some form of therapy to help you stop due to you, quite literately, driving yourself crazy with your own inner dialog.
One of the most common things we’ll beat ourselves up about is for something we’ve said that we wish we could take back. We’ll have to face this many times in life due to the fact that we don’t always think before we speak, especially when, we don’t have all the facts in front of us.
Saying something you shouldn’t have said, can haunt you. It’ll play over and over again in your mind no matter how hard you try to push it away. These thoughts can intrude into your perfect day, when you least expect it, causing you to berate yourself and think you’re a bad person.
It’s also common for us to berate ourselves for something we should’ve said too, especially if it means standing up for ourselves, or how not saying anything affects those around us.
We can beat ourselves up over our actions or inactions. Since most of our learning experiences are based on our interactions with others, what we do to them may weigh heavily upon us. This is also true for what we’ll let others do to us.
Another thing we can beat ourselves up for is our choices. Why did I do this, or why did I do that? Why didn’t I do this, or why didn’t I do that? Then, of course you have the, I should of/could of/would of, done that, or you bombard yourself with; if only I did this or that. All of this is enough to fry anyone’s brain.
When a loved one dies, we do all of the above to the point where we can damage our own health. Acceptance is not an easy road for a lot of us, and death is one of the hardest things for many to accept, especially if they blame themselves for how their loved one died.
The things we buy are another way to beat ourselves up. I’m doing that right now with the refrigerator I just purchased, but others can do it because the car they bought turned out to be a lemon, or the house they bought is next door to terrible neighbors.
But, the thing we can lose sight of, through all of these examples and experiences, is beating yourself up is a choice, and when you do it to yourself, you’re being our own worst enemy. The question it leaves us with is; why do we continue to do this to ourselves?
Some do it because they feel they deserve it. They’re so down on themselves causing their internal dialog to be dark and negative. In other words, they’re not being kind to themselves. With this level of beating yourself up, it can be extremely difficult to get through to them, when, they’re stuck in this state of mind.
Beating yourself up goes hand and hand with regret, longing, and sorrow, to name a few. Losing a friend or significant other, can send you spinning in despair wishing you had never said what you said or did what you did.
If your beating yourself up for something you said or did, or for what you didn’t say or do, you have to try your best to fix it, but if it can’t be fixed, then, you think of a way to make amends for your actions/inactions, or for what you said or didn’t say. That’s really all you can do.
When you’re dealing with negative people who mean you harm, it makes you react with like energy. Why? Because you’re being drawn into their negative karma, and you have no choice but to protect yourself in kind.
Karma is very complex, and we’re trying to balance it with so many people at any given moment, but that’s life. That’s what our souls have signed up for.
Each and every day, we have a menu of emotions waiting to be ordered by the forces that are out of our control. This force wants to order up as many emotions as it can, both positive and negative, but it’s always up to us on what emotions we’re going to serve them.
Beating yourself up is just another level to beat in your mind games. Your mindset is what fuels your game, so try to keep your choices positive for yourself and all those around you.
And remember; where your thoughts go; your energy flows.
In my last Mind Games article, I forgot I said I would be writing about the virtue of patience. Oops. I guess I’ll write that next time, so you’ll just have to be patient. Hehehe
Thanks for stopping by. Hope you enjoyed your visit. Stay safe and be well. Bye for now.
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