By Paula Bianchi –
Since we all worry, I thought this would be a good mind game to cover and try to point out some ways to rise above it, because worry is something we use to project our worst-case scenarios. It’s also a way we may choose to react to things that are out of our control.
Every mother or father worries about their child, from the time they’re born and into their adult lives, then, our kids worry about us in our golden years. Families worry about their health & mental health, friends, activities, safety, if their parenting right, who they’ll marry, and careers, to name a few.
We worry about keeping our jobs or finding a new one. There’s worry if our boss or co-workers like us. Our worry for money goes hand and hand with our ability to secure a well-paying job for ourselves and our families.
Worry for money is probably at the top of our list because it’s a necessity in our society. Our way of life depends on it. It dictates where we’ll live, and what our station in life will be. It can also determine who our friends or significant other will be.
The worry of death is never too far from our imaginings. We all worry about the day death will come to us. We worry over the how, why, when and where of it, and what it’ll do to the people we leave behind. Some of us plan and try to secure our worry, so we can let it go. This does work to put worry behind us. It helps to know all our bases are covered before we leave this world, but even after all the planning is done, we still can’t get ourselves to not worry about the event itself.
Every day that we’re alive, worry creeps into to our thoughts and wellbeing. For some of us, it’s an obstacle that’s too overwhelming, while others learn to use it as a tool to grow and learn from. It just depends on the person, and how they choose to deal with it.
My grandmother lived her daily life submerged in worry. From the moment she woke up, to the moment she went to bed, she was worrying about something. This was very trying for my mother to deal with. Grandma would call my mom, almost daily, to get my mom to try and do something to fix her worries. I remember some of the conversations where I could overhear my mom trying to put grandma’s worries to rest, and it would work for a while, until, she found something new to worry about.
This is a perfect example of how our thoughts can either make or break us. It’s not easy dealing with a perpetual worrier especially when their worries are based on fear and not on fact. They may choose not to listen to reason even when they know we’re right. If they do listen but continue to hold on to their worries, then they’re a victim of their own making.
How we react to the mind game of worry, can make a big impact on our lives. We can either take worry and put it in its place, or we can let it consume us. The choice is up to us. When worry raises its ugly head, step back and take a moment to see if, it’s based on fear, or based on something that’s out of our control.
Fear based worries are sometimes difficult to deal with because our fears are so real to us. Being worried about future events that may or may not happen, can cloud our minds and make it harder to push that worry away. Worrying about our family members getting hurt from their favorite activities, (like skydiving, scuba diving, driving race cars, etc.), will only bring you down.
I found two things I can do that have helped me to accept my worries. The first thing I say to myself, when a fear-based worry floods my brain is, “I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.” The second thing I do to try and win my mind game is, coming up with a plan on what to do in case my fearful worry comes true. I found that if I do that, it takes the power of my worry away. The last thing I do, constantly to overcome anything with my mind, is recite the Serenity Prayer.
To be worried about something that’s out of our control can hit us personally when it comes to our work or family because it’s usually the actions or inaction’s of others that really impacts our lives and makes us worry. We can worry about losing our job due to other people’s actions towards us. When a vindictive co-worker or boss is in control of our livelihood, how can we not worry?
Dealing with this on a daily basis, can be draining. The best thing we can do is to take ourselves out of the equation and find a new job. People only continue to hurt us if we let them. Leaving, takes their power over you away.
We may worry as we watch a loved one’s life spiral out of control leaving us powerless to help them because of their own choices. Well, sometimes we may have to take ourselves out or their drama for our own piece of mind. It’s better, at times, to just walk away from our worry.
We are the orchestra leaders of our own thoughts and feelings. Where are we going to let our thoughts take us? If we sit and focus on all the negative fearful thoughts we’re having, we’re missing the lesson on why this worry is being presented to us in the first place. For our spiritual growth.
Believe it or not, we’ve planned out every lesson, with every worry possible, throughout our lives. The choices we make when trying to deal with our worries, are either going to be positive ones or negative ones. Which way do you want to grow and learn from?
In my next mind games article, my topic will be judging. As always, I’m grateful for your time and your visit. Bye for now.